I wanted to put a disclaimer for this post.This is not my normal take on my kids or grandkids. I wanted to vent. Just say what I need to say and move from there.
I found out that I will have relatives from out of the country (Peru) coming for a visit. I am so excited. I haven't seen them since I was two. Lets say it has been 40 years since I have seen them and sadly I do not have any recollection of them . My uncle, on my fathers side, will be arriving with his wife and daughter.
I am excited about planning a party. I like to do the little details and now with a little more coin in my pocket I can really go for it. The only bee in my bonnet is my mom.
There was a post I read from Maxabella's blog. It was about having the house in perfect order when we expect visitors. Why do we put up a facade, if it is not always that way?
I tend to clean prior to family and friends for the occasional party. I am guilty of this charade. Now that I have any empty nest, my house is not that crazy all the time. Though it did, when I was watching my grandchildren for two weeks straight.
The illusions of a perfect home need to reappear. Now why would a mid forty woman grandmother to five want to go the extra mile? My mom! She has a way to make me nuts without saying a word.
My mom is a very formidable woman. How can a woman in her mid 70's control from such a distance? She live in New york. It is hundreds of miles away.
They plan to only be here for one day but I know that she will be watching everything I do, say, and wear. Why do I still seek her approval? Sshouldn't I already have it? Do I think I will lose it, if I don't do, say, and wear everything I think she will approve .
I think what will drive me even more crazy is the next day. I think what I am dreading is the phone call. Most people will call and express to the host, they had a great time. My mom will tell me the good, but most of time it is to critique. If it is good, it sounds like she is surprised that I pulled it off. I don't know how to take that sometimes. I want to say sometimes "good lord woman what will it take before you see that I am a grown woman who can and does take care of herself."
Soooo mature. I know.
The bad, which is most of the time, why did you do it this way? Where was so and so? Why did you have this? My, you have gained weight, but if you want to look like an elephant go ahead. She used to be worse and would tell me that my husband would leave me if I kept this weight. Her way of being supportive.
She would respond with "I am not telling you what to do. I am just advising you. I want to warn you that you might lose your husband, but if don't care about your looks I don't care either.
Its just that I never asked her for her advise!! I already knew what she thought. My mom hasn't been on me about my weight for these last few years. Now it is the gray hairs, she wishes I would dye it.
On one hand, I am looking very forward to meeting my relatives and on the other hand, I am anxious about the scrutiny I will be under.
My husband built a bar in the family room. It was a hit at many of our parties. I plan to visit my bar regularly.
Under the microscope Abbie